Lossing Faith

Lately, because of all that has happened this summer, I've been so down and found myself asking whether prayer does really work and whether God does indeed hears and answers.
I know he does, but you know those times when things happen to make you ask quesitons and question your belief.

I have resigned myself to the knowledge that I am 35 and after trying for 4 and a half years, with 2 failed IVF cycle and 3 cycles of Clomid, I am still not pregnant.
I have confessed the word, held on to it, smiled through the pain, attended prayer sessions, seminars, you name it, and still nothing.

So it is no surprise that I don't have much faith anymore or hope for it to happen, I have just kind of resigned myself to thinking, "whatever will be" "will be".

Then God lead me to some wonderful blogs and I have been so encouraged by the many entries, my faith was stirred up again. A good friend also encouraged me to continue to hold on to the hope I have and to continue to trust throught the waiting season.

I repented and asked God for forgiveness and for the strenght to trust him through it all.
Though it is hard, this I know "he is faithful who has promised and will bring it to pass"

Truth

Is truth physical?
Is is real?
Can I see it?
Can I touch it?
Can I know it?
What is truth.
who determines the truth of a matter?
Man or God?

Say I can't tell, I can't know, I can't percieve what the truth of a matter is...
but I can choose to believe a thing, relate to a thought and believe a saying
if it's the written word of God.
To me that is the truth.
It matters not if I cannot see it, touch it, know it or perceive it, it matters that God said it and his word will not fall to the ground or fail.
That is truth, abstract or vague, I believe it.

Copyrighted to Rina Rose

Not in the Wind

I am sane, I am whole, I am alive, still and well,
I am not a myth, I am living and well, this is me,
solid and stable.
I am not in the wind of pain, worry, fear, or doubth
but in the wind of hope, love, faith and well being.
My desires are carried through the wind to the bossom of the faithful father
hearer of all prayers and giver of life
he brings all request to be
and causes Joy abundance in my heart.
I am not in the wind, my pain is real, but not parmanent,
it is a passing phase, just like the wind,
A calmness will unfold, and with it my expectation will be met.

Copyrighted to Rina Tarir

Hush My Heart

It is a longing, that will not wane,
it is a yeaning that will linger,
it is a cry that is silent,
it is a prayer that is whispered,
it is nod that is not seen,
it is a jab that pieces through my heart,
it is stares shot by others, wondering when will it be,
it is the unspoken questions on their faces that makes my heart bleed.
But it is his love that soothes,
comforting, shielding, and covering,
holding me dear,
it is this assurances, that keeps me hoping and holding on.


copy rigthed to Rina Tarir.